Ed Skompski (VP hear at SI) had this story sent to him. Perhaps it’s even true…
During a private “fly-in” fishing excursion in the Alaskan wilderness, the chartered pilot and fishermen left a cooler and bait in the plane. And a bear smelled it. This is what he did to the plane…
The pilot used his radio and had another pilot bring him 2 new tires, 3 cases of duct tape, and a supply of sheet plastic. He patched the plane together and FLEW IT HOME!
A TapRooT® user sent me these photos and said that the driver was “lucky.”
I really can’t tell what is holding that truck up there … Maybe that’s why they think the driver is “lucky.” But I can’t help but think if they really were “lucky”, they wouldn’t have had the wreck in the first place! I guess it is all in your perspective…
The patient who was getting an MRI had a knife strapped to his leg (guess he wanted to be ready for anything during the MRI). The story then says…
“The knife got sucked out of its sheath and cut the patient in the abdomen, requiring stitches. Before he was taken to the MRI, the patient was screened for objects that would be attracted to the magnet. He reportedly ’stated that his pockets were empty.‘”
So I looked into my bathroom at the hotel, and I think, hey, a little small, but OK…
Then I looked a little closer, and noticed something doesn’t look quite right…
Hmm, THIS could be interesting!
I’ve seen accident investigations (not using TapRooT®, of course!) that point to the worker as needing to be more careful. “Inattention to detail” is the root cause. “Worker did not keep eyes on path.” It’s easy to come up with these poor “root causes.” What we really need to do is find out why the worker was “clumsy.” There’s a good chance that there was a poorly-designed piece of equipment, walkway, or room arrangement that made it very difficult to do a job correctly. I’ll try to avoid hurting myself in this room. I’ll “be more careful.”
Ah … the Snuggie … the solution for anyone who wants to be “wrapped in warmth” this winter (and dressed like a medieval monk). A trend that has transcended advertising to become part of pop culture.
BUT WAIT … THERE IS MORE
THE JAPANESE SNUGGIE!
Apparently, there’s an interview with the inventor of the Japanese Snuggie (on the ad page) that reveals his reasoning behind creating the product:
1. You can’t get the things you need without leaving your sleeping bag.
2. You can’t stand up and run away in a sleeping bag when attacked by a bear.
3. You can’t turn around in your sleep, or bend the wall of the sleeping bag, and it is constrictive.
Hmmm … I’ll wait for the YouTube video showing someone trying to outrun a bear in one of those.
These workers are working hard to install iron poles around the front of a bar to keep patrons from parking right next to the bar. How long until they realize …
their work truck is parked inside of the freshly installed poles?
Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits. - Anonymous
Never tell your resolution beforehand, or it’s twice as onerous a duty. - John Selden
Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average… which means, you have met your New Year’s resolution. - Jay Leno
New Year’s Day… now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual. - Mark Twain
A dog’s New Year’s Resolution: I will not chase that stick unless I actually see it leave his hand! - Anonymous
May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions! - Joey Adams
A family had twin boys whose only resemblance to each other was their looks. If one felt it was too hot, the other thought it was too cold. If one said the TV was too loud, the other claimed the volume needed to be turned up. Opposite in every way, one was an eternal optimist, the other a doom and gloom pessimist.
Just to see what would happen, at Christmas time their father loaded the pessimist’s room with every imaginable toy and game. The optimist’s room he loaded with horse manure.
That night the father passed by the pessimist’s room and found him sitting amid his new gifts crying bitterly.
“Why are you crying?” the father asked.
“Because my friends will be jealous, I’ll have to read all these instructions before I can do anything with this stuff, I’ll constantly need batteries, and my toys will eventually get broken.” answered the pessimist twin.
Passing the optimist twin’s room, the father found him dancing for joy in the pile of manure. “What are you so happy about?” he asked.
To which his optimist twin replied, “There’s got to be a pony in here somewhere!”
Today’s global challenges require the North Pole to continue to look for better, more competitive steps. Effective immediately, the following economy measures are to take place in the “Twelve Days of Christmas” subsidiary:
The partridge will be retained, but the pear tree never turned out to be the cash crop forecasted. It will be replaced by a plastic hanging plant, providing considerable savings in maintenance.
The two turtle doves represent a redundancy that is simply not cost effective. In addition, their romance during working hours could not be condoned. The positions are therefore eliminated.
The three French hens will remain intact. After all, everyone loves the French.
The four calling birds were replaced by an automated voice mail system, with a call waiting option. An analysis is underway to determine who the birds have been calling, how often and how long they talked.
The five golden rings have been put on hold by the Board of Directors. Maintaining a portfolio based on one commodity could have negative implications for institutional investors. Diversification into other precious metals as well as a mix of T-Bills and high technology stocks appear to be in order.
The six geese-a-layingconstitutes a luxury which can no longer be afforded. It has long been felt that the production rate of one egg per goose per day is an example of the decline in productivity. Three geese will be let go, and an upgrading in the selection procedure by personnel will assure management that from now on every goose it gets will be a good one.
The seven swans-a-swimming is obviously a number chosen in better times. Their function is primarily decorative. Mechanical swans are on order. The current swans will be retrained to learn some new strokes and therefore enhance their outplacement.
As you know, the eight maids-a-milking concept has been under heavy scrutiny by the EEOC. A male/female balance in the workforce is being sought. The more militant maids consider this a dead-end job with no upward mobility. Automation of the process may permit the maids to try a-mending, a-mentoring or a-mulching.
Nine ladies dancing has always been an odd number. This function will be phased out as these individuals grow older and can no longer do the steps.
Ten Lords-a-leaping is overkill. The high cost of Lords plus the expense of international air travel prompted the Compensation Committee to suggest replacing this group with ten out-of-work congressmen. While leaping ability may be somewhat sacrificed, the savings are significant because we expect an oversupply of unemployed congressmen this year.
Eleven pipers piping and twelve drummers drumming is a simple case of the band getting too big. A substitution with a string quartet, a cut back on new music and no uniforms will produce savings which will drop right down to the bottom line.
We can expect a substantial reduction in assorted people, fowl, animals and other expenses. Though incomplete, studies indicate that stretching deliveries over twelve days is inefficient. If we can drop ship in one day, service levels will be improved.
Regarding the lawsuit filed by the attorney’s association seeking expansion to include the legal profession (”thirteen lawyers-a-suing”), action is pending.
Lastly, it is not beyond consideration that deeper cuts may be necessary in the future to stay competitive. Should that happen, the Board will request management to scrutinize the Snow White Division to see if seven dwarfs is the right number.
Warning: The sheer joy in Matt Harding’s “international jig” will give you a serious case of the wanderlust … but don’t worry about missing a TapRooT® course — we train globally! I think our 45 instructors around the world could make an awesome video like this — what do you think?
How is fear of the number 13 demonstrated? To some it is no joke! Did you know:
More than 80 percent of high-rises lack a 13th floor.
Many airports skip the 13th gate.
Airplanes have no 13th aisle.
Hospitals and hotels regularly have no room number 13.
Italians omit the number 13 from their national lottery.
On streets in Florence, Italy, the house between number 12 and 14 is addressed as 12 and a half.
Many cities do not have a 13th Street or a 13th Avenue.
In France, socialites known as the quatorziens (fourteeners) once made themselves available as 14th guests to keep a dinner party from an unlucky fate.
Many triskaidekaphobes, as those who fear the unlucky integer are known, point to the ill-fated mission to the moon, Apollo 13.
Jack the Ripper, Charles Manson, Jeffrey Dahmer, Theodore Bundy and Albert De Salvo all have 13 letters in their names.
In case you haven’t heard, there is a new definition of “bottomless.”
Please pay before you touch because we won’t be able
to bill you later.
Accidental art? Some people just won’t admit when they have an accident. Maybe the company policy is to be 100% accident free so the driver had to quickly improvise.
Got it. Now when the office is not open, do the same rules apply?
Getting yourself into hot water takes on new meaning — literally.
When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if it’s really dead. It isn’t.
If you find that your house is built upon or near a cemetery, was once a church that was used for black masses, had previous inhabitants who went mad or committed suicide or died in some horrible fashion, or had inhabitants who performed satanic practices in your house move immediately.
Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.
Do not search the basement, especially if the power has just gone out.
When you have the benefit of a group of people, NEVER pair off and go it alone.
If you’re searching for something that caused a noise and find out that it’s just the cat, leave the room immediately if you value your life.
If you find a town that looks deserted, it’s probably for a reason. Take the hint and leave NOW!!
Don’t fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you’re sure you know what you are doing. Even then, don’t do it.
If you’re running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice … even though you may be faster than the monster, you can be sure that it WILL catch you.
If your friends suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so on, get away from them as fast as possible.
Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Meskatonic University, Camp Crystal Lake, Haddonfield, Illinois, one gas station desert towns or any small town in Maine. If your car runs out of gas at night, do not go to the nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help.
Beware of strangers bearing tools such as chainsaws, staple guns, hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, butane torches, soldering irons, or band saws. This is especially true if they are wearing a hockey mask or one made of human skin.
(excerpted from http://www.halloween-online.com/jokes/halloween-jokes-rules.html)
A strong young man at a construction site was bragging that he could defeat anyone in a contest of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workers.
After several minutes, the older worker had enough.
“Why don’t you put your money where your mouth is,” he said. “I bet you a hundred dollars that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that building that you won’t be able to wheel back.”
“You’re on, old man,” the younger man replied. “Let’s see you do it.”
The old man reached out and grabbed a near by construction wheelbarrow by the handles. Then, nodding to the young man, he said,
We all know the hazards of mixing alcohol with high-risk activities. And yet, this is an entry in the sailing log of the USS Constitution from 1779, courtesy of the National Park Service. By the way, in no way is this to be construed as a recommendation!
“On 23 August 1779, the USS Constitution set sail from Boston, loaded with 475 officers and men, 48,600 gallons of water, 74,000 cannon shot, 11,500 pounds of black powder and 79,400 gallons of rum. Her mission: to destroy and harass English shipping.
On 6 October, she made Jamaica, took on 826 pounds of flour and 68,300 gallons of rum. Three weeks later, Constitution reached the Azores, where she provisioned with 550 pounds of beef and 6,300 gallons of Portuguese wine.
On 18 November, she set sail for England where her crew captured and scuttled 12 English merchant vessels and took aboard their rum. By this time, Constitution had run out of shot. Nevertheless, she made her way unarmed up the Firth of Clyde for a night raid. Here, her landing party captured a whiskey distillery, transferred 40,000 gallons aboard and headed for home.
On 20 February 1780, the Constitution arrived in Boston with no cannon shot, no food, no powder, no rum and no whiskey. She did, however, still carry her crew of 475 officers and men and 48,600 gallons of water.“
LAW 1: No matter how bad your last shot was, the worst is yet to come. This law does not expire on the 18th hole, since it has the supernatural tendency to extend over the course of a tournament, a summer and, eventually, a lifetime.
LAW 2: Your best round of golf will be followed almost immediately by your worst round ever. The probability of the latter increases with the number of people you tell about the former.
LAW 3: Brand new golf balls are water-magnetic. Though this cannot be proven in the lab, it is a known fact that the more expensive the golf ball, the greater its attraction to water.
LAW 4: Golf balls never bounce off of trees back into play. If one does, the tree is breaking a law of the universe and should be cut down.
LAW 5: No matter what causes a golfer to muff a shot, all his playing partners must solemnly chant “You looked up,” or invoke the wrath of the universe.
LAW 6: The higher a golfer’s handicap, the more qualified he deems himself as an instructor.
LAW 7: Every par-three hole in the world has a secret desire to humiliate golfers. The shorter the hole, the greater its desire.
LAW 8: Topping a 3-iron is the most painful torture known to man.
LAW 9: Palm trees eat golf balls.
LAW 10: Sand is alive. If it isn’t, how do you explain the way it works against you?
LAW 11: Golf carts always run out of juice at the farthest point from the clubhouse.
LAW 12: A golfer hitting into your group will always be bigger than anyone in your group. Likewise, a group you accidentally hit into will consist of a football player, a professional wrestler, a convicted murderer and an IRS agent — or some similar combination.
LAW 13: All 3-woods are demon-possessed.
LAW 14: Golf balls from the same “sleeve” tend to follow one another, particularly out of bounds or into the water (See Law three).
LAW 15: A severe slice is a thing of awesome power and beauty.
LAW 16: “Nice lag” can usually be translated to “lousy putt.” Similarly, “tough break” can usually be translated “way to miss an easy one, sucker.”
LAW 17: The person you would most hate to lose to will always be the one who beats you.
LAW 18: The last three holes of a round will automatically adjust your score to what it really should be.
LAW 19: Golf should be given up at least twice per month.
LAW 20: All vows taken on a golf course shall be valid only until the sunset.
Follow the TapRooT® 6th Annual Scramble Charity Golf Tournament results here at the Root Cause Analysis Blog, and make plans to join us in San Antonio next year!
There was an engineer, manager and programmer driving down a steep mountain road. The brakes failed and the car careened down the road out of control. Half way down the driver managed to stop the car by running it against the embankment narrowing avoiding going over a cliff. They all got out, shaken by their narrow escape from death, but otherwise unharmed.
The manager said, “To fix this problem we need to organize a committee, have meetings, and develop a solution.”
The engineer said, “No, that would take too long, and besides that method never worked before. We need to start by drawing a Spring SnapCharT® to understand what actually happened, then use a tool in the Equifactor® software to select possible causes.”
The programmer said, “I think you’re both wrong! I think we should all push the car back up the hill and see if it happens again!”
Mike Rodriguez (a TapRooT® User who is signed up for the Summit and the Summit Golf Tournament) send me these quotes. Gives you some things to think about between now and the Summit!
(Thats Mike on the left)
Here are the quotes…
These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow.
~ Sam Snead
A hungry dog hunts best.
~ Lee Trevino
You can talk to a fade but a hook won’t listen..
~ Lee Trevino
I was three over. One over a house, one over a patio, and one over a swimming pool.
~ George Brett
Actually, the only time I ever took out a one-iron was to kill a tarantula. And I took a 7 to do that.
~ Jim Murray
The only sure rule in golf is - he who has the fastest cart never has to play the bad lie.
~ Mickey Mantle
Sex and golf are the two things you can enjoy even if you’re not good at them.
~ Kevin Costner
I don’t fear death, but I sure don’t like those three-footers for par.
~ Chi Chi Rodriguez
After all these years, it’s still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye.
~ Chi Chi Rodriguez
The ball retriever is not long enough to get my putter out of the tree.
~ Brian Weis
Swing hard in case you hit it.
~ Dan Marino
My favorite shots are the practice swing and the conceded putt. The rest can never be mastered.
~ Lord Robertson
Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
~ Jack Benny
There is no similarity between golf and putting; they are two different games, one played in the air, and the other on the ground..
~ Ben Hogan
Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you’re the best
~ Jack Nicklaus
The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf. It’s almost a law.
~ H G Wells
I never pray on a golf course. Actually, the Lord answers my prayers everywhere except on the course.
~ Billy Graham
If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play at it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.
~ Bob Hope
While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
~ Henny Youngman
If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
~ Jack Lemmon
You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.
~ Lee Trevino
I’m not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they’d come up sliced.
As an owner of a company, I’ll have to implement this “sign” best practice immediately.
First, notice all the signs near this business entrance…
This is real. It was taken down by the waterfront in Seattle. Five signs in a small area. From “NO LOITERING” to DO NOT BLOCK THE DOOR.”
Then look closely at this sign:
Who knew it was so easy to avoid liability for accidents at your site?
I bet we will see many more of these signs if only they worked.
Why?
It is much easier to post a sign than to really improve performance by fixing the root causes of problems both reactively (after accidents) and proactively (before accidents).
Which method are you using? Posting signs or improving performance?
You really don’t want your facility to show up hear is a Friday Joke or a Monday Accident and Lessons Learned!
(Thanks to Mhorvan Sherret for spotting these signs in Seattle and sending me the picture. Mhorvan is one of our TapRooT® Instructors from the UK.)
To learn real best practices, participate in the TapRooT® Summit! See:
Hmmm … I’ll wait for the YouTube video showing someone trying to outrun a bear in one of those.
