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Archive for the ‘Jokes’ Category

Friday Joke - Do You Jump to Conclusions When Finding the Root Causes of Problems?

Friday, October 13th, 2006

The video below reminds me of investigators who quickly jump to conclusions when analyzing root causes.

To view the video click on: DeadFly-2.wmv

How does your root cause analysis system help you avoid jumping to conclusions? TapRooT® Users have a systematic process that produces evidence driven investigations and fact based root cause analysis. Don’t assume you know the answer. Use TapRooT® to get:

• Repeatable

• Defendable

• Explainable

• Documented

• Evidence Driven

• Fact Based

Root Cause Analysis.

Click here to find out about our training and here to find out about our software.

Friday Joke - Dilbert Subscription

Friday, October 6th, 2006

I like to post the funniest, most applicable jokes here each Friday but I thought you might want a daily e-mail to cheer your day. If so, you can sign up to get a daily e-mail from Scott Adams, the Dilbert cartoonist, with the latest Dilbert cartoon.

Here’s the link to subscribe at:

https://members.comics.com/members/registration/showDilbertLogin.do?aid=1

And if you would like to see today’s strip, click here.

Friday Joke: Rescue Gone Awry

Friday, September 29th, 2006

Click on the video below … Should you laugh or should you cry?

Rescuegoneawry

If you owned the helicopter, you would cry!

Friday Joke: Spin-A-Cause™

Friday, September 22nd, 2006

How do you find root causes?

Try this!

 Blog Spin-A-Cause

Friday Joke - Bad Instructions

Friday, September 15th, 2006

Here’s some bad instructions and comments …

On Sears hairdryer:

Do not use while sleeping.

(Gee, that’s the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:

You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:

Directions: Use like regular soap.

(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:

Serving suggestion: Defrost.

(But it’s ‘just’ a suggestion!)

On Tesco’s Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)

Do not turn upside down.

(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:

Product will be hot after heating.

(Are you sure? Let’s experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:

Do not iron clothes on body.

(But wouldn’t that save more time?)

(Whose body?)

On Boot’s Children’s cough medicine:

Do not drive car or operate machinery.

(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:

Warning: may cause drowsiness.

(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:

Warning: keep out of children.

(hmm…something must have gotten lost in the translation…)

On a string of Christmas lights:

For indoor or outdoor use only.

(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:

Not to be used for the other use.

(Now I’m curious.)

On Sainsbury’s peanuts:

Warning: contains nuts.

(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:

Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.

(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one…)

On a Swedish chainsaw:

Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.

(Raise your hand if you’ve tried this…)

On a child’s Superman costume:

Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.

(Oh go ahead! That’s right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

I’ve seen these long ago (early 90’s) but found them at:

http://www.lotsofjokes.com/cat_122.htm

FRIDAY JOKE: An addition to the Bricklayers Accident Report

Friday, September 8th, 2006

From many sources on the internet…

This is a bricklayer’s accident report that was printed in the newsletter of the English equivalent of the Workers’ Compensation Board.

Dear Sir;

I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block #3 of the accident reporting form. I put “Poor Planning” as the cause of my accident. You asked for a more complete explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my work, I found I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later, were found to weigh 240 lbs. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley which was attached to the side of the building at the sixth floor.

Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out, and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to insure a slow descent of the 240 lbs of bricks. You will note on the accident reporting form that my weight is 135 lbs.

Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explains the fractured skull, minor abrasions, and the broken collarbone, as listed in Section 3, accident reporting form.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley which I mentioned in Paragraph 2 of this correspondence. Fortunately, by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of the excruciating pain I was now beginning to experience.

(more…)

Friday Joke - Dilbert’s Corrective Action Recommendation Results in a Safety Violation

Friday, September 1st, 2006

We’ve all had a bad corrective action program review meeting. Off the wall questions, last minute changes, unreasonable cost constraints, and more.

What did Dilbert face? See this link:

http://www.dilbert.com/comics/dilbert/archive/images/dilbert2916120060814.gif

Does this make you think of your last root cause analysis meeting when you arrived at the corrective actions approval?

FRIDAY JOKE: You know it’s a bad day when a picture of your new Ferrari makes the rounds of the internet - WRECKED!

Friday, August 25th, 2006

What a beautiful car!

Image001 111

Image002 77

To see the rest of the story, click below.

(more…)

FRIDAY JOKE: PICTURES … A bad day for the pilot!

Friday, August 18th, 2006

If your a pilot, you know it’s a bad day when…

Image006 11-1

Image008 12-1

Image001 72-1

Click on pictures to enlarge …

Click below for more …

(more…)

FRIDAY JOKE - Tight Parking? Here’s an answer …

Friday, August 11th, 2006

In California car parking is often tight. So the fully submersible mini-van was invented for those with a pool but no parking space.

Image018

Friday Joke - Beauty or Brains? (And what is the ROI?)

Friday, August 4th, 2006

If you get upset by reading jokes … don’t read jokes. If you get upset when you read this joke, REMEMBER …

ALL readers of this blog are ABOVE AVERAGE … so this joke doesn’t apply to you!

Michele Lindsay, a TapRooT(R) Instructor in Canada, sent the following joke:

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains,

because the average man can see better than he can think.

This made me think…

What does management really want when they ask for a root cause analysis?

They really want the problems to stop and the costs to be minimal. If no real change is required, that would be great.

It is our job to educate them that you can’t get something for nothing. Meaningful change requires work.

The question is … can we demonstrate the return on investment from root cause analysis that makes the whole process worthwhile?

I think we can. See http://www.taproot.com/about.php for Success Stories from TapRooT® Users. I think they demonstrate what is possible.

Once management understands that an investment is required, then the only question left is the ROI - which we NEED to demonstrate to prove that the effort is worthwhile.

Thus even for the joke - we need to demonstrate that the value is there - whether it is “men” or “management” - “beauty”, “brains”, or “return on investment”.

Prove your worth.

Friday Joke - Not My Job Award Winner

Friday, July 28th, 2006

529Fe1F5

Is the joke …

“Why did the armadillo cross the road?”

OR

“What’s the root cause of the armadillo accident?”

OR

“Hey, what happened to my armadillo and hot sauce sandwich?”

Friday Joke - Ken Discovers New Class of Submarine

Friday, July 21st, 2006

Ken Reed - our Equifactor® expert - spent 21 years in the Nuclear Navy. He retired last year as a Master Chief on one of the newest submarines, the USS Seawolf. I suppose that is why he was so excited when he discovered this secret R&D photo for a new class of submarine/airplane.

Image009 7

Friday Joke - Just Doing What the Sign Said

Friday, July 14th, 2006

 Oops Stay-Off

(Click on picture to enlarge.)

Friday Joke - Don’t Worry - It Couldn’t Happen Twice in the Same Place!

Friday, July 7th, 2006

529Fe1B6

(Click on picture to enlarge.)

Friday Joke - Sometimes Hazards Just Aren’t Obvious to Those Close to the Problem

Friday, June 30th, 2006

529Fe1A7

OK - What is the biggest hazard to the unborn baby?

This is the Friday Joke but … it demonstrates that those closest to the problem sometimes don’t see the problem.

Friday Joke: Fire Protection Needs Improvement

Friday, June 23rd, 2006

I thought the bucket brigade was obsolete until Ken Reed, one of our TapRooT(R) Instructors, sent me this picture.

Fire Bucket

(Click on picture to expand.)

Seems to me that evacuation would be the best idea….

Friday Joke - For Those Who Don’t Read Signs

Friday, June 16th, 2006

 Media Pic 0237

(click on picture to enlarge)

Friday Joke - truly “stealthy” fighter

Friday, June 9th, 2006

 Oops Stealth-Fighter

(Click the picture to make it bigger so you will get the joke.)

Friday Joke - Two for the Price of One

Friday, June 2nd, 2006

Sent to me by Linda Unger, VP at System Improvements:

529Fe197

Was this a two for one sale or just common courtesy in New York (note that they both have New York plates)? I think the root cause was that they wanted to become the Friday Joke!

Friday Joke - A T-Shirt for the Participants in the Day 2 Communication Exercise (2-Day TapRooT(R) Course)

Friday, May 26th, 2006

529Fe1C6

You won’t get this one unless you have attended a TapRooT(R) Course.

Friday Joke - What Do The Locals Know That We Don’t?

Friday, May 19th, 2006

 Media Pic 0325

Friday Joke - Stupid Idea - Must be a Joke?

Friday, May 12th, 2006

Painteronbuckets-1

Could this be real?

It’s an Accident waiting to happen.

And the root cause would be???

Friday Joke - Which Sign Do I Follow???

Friday, May 5th, 2006

Image009

Friday Joke - Who Needs Help?

Friday, April 28th, 2006

Image006

Friday Joke - The seagull incident

Friday, April 21st, 2006

This was definitely NOT a near-miss for the seagull.

Click on the movie below to observe the incident.

Birdie

Then ask - What was the Hazard? - What was the Target? - What were the Safeguards?

Friday Joke - Miscommunication Example

Friday, April 14th, 2006

Yes, I know this is a blonde joke but … was it the student or the teacher that was most wrong for this test question…

Findx

(Click on the figure above to enlarge.)

Friday Joke - TapRooT(R) Summit Golf Tournament is Next Friday!

Friday, March 31st, 2006

Yes, some who have seen me play might think that my golf game is a joke…



Perhaps that is why Michele, a TapRooT(R) Instructor from Canada who will also be playing in the tournament, sent me this joke in an e-mail (was she trying to psych me out?):

List of Top 10 Caddy Comments:

#10 Golfer: “Think I’m going to drown myself in the lake.”

Caddy: “Think you can keep your head down that long?”

#9 Golfer: “I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.”

Caddy: “Try heaven, you’ve already moved most of the earth.”

#8 Golfer: “Do you think my game is improving?”

Caddy: “Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now.”

#7 Golfer: “Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?”

Caddy: “Eventually.”

#6 Golfer: “You’ve got to be the worst caddy in the world.”

Caddy: “I don’t think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence.”

#5 Golfer: “Please stop checking your watch all the time. It’s too much of a distraction.”

Caddy: “It’s not a watch - it’s a compass.”

#4 Golfer: “How do you like my game?”

Caddy: “Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf.”

#3 Golfer: “Do you think it’s a sin to play on Sunday?”

Caddy: “The way you play, sir, it’s a sin on any day.”

#2 Golfer: “This is the worst course I’ve ever played on.”

Caddy: “This isn’t the golf course. We left that an hour ago.”

. . And the #1 best caddy comment:

Golfer: “That can’t be my ball, it’s too old.”

Caddy: “It’s been a long time since we teed off, sir.”



One lucky fact … There are no caddies at the TapRooT(R) Summit Tournament!

Hope to see you there!

(PS: We need two more golfers to round out the field of 40 in this the third TapRooT(R) Summit Golf Tournament. To register call Becky or Katrina at 865-539-2139.)

Friday Joke - No One Is Useless

Friday, March 24th, 2006

I haven’t had any time to work on the blog this week (to busy with Summit prep). But I couldn’t let a Friday go without a joke.

This joke is from a past TapRooT(R) Summit. One of the attendees told me:

“Remember - no one is completely useless … They can always be used as the bad example!”

Friday Joke - Hitting The Beach

Friday, March 17th, 2006

Brit_Beach_Assault.wmv (for video, click on link to the left)

Some days you just shouldn’t get out of bed - or at least you should stay in the boat.

This video was passed along to us by Marty Locker who thought that TapRooT(R) Users might be able to appreciate that hazards (quick sand) aren’t always very visible.

Friday Joke - Investigation Gone Wild

Friday, March 10th, 2006

Some people just can’t get enough stickies on their SnapCharT(R). But click below on the continuation link, and you will see an Investigation Gone Wild!

(more…)

Friday Joke - Chicken Limbo “Collapses” - Let’s Go Tell the King!

Friday, March 3rd, 2006

Chicken Limbo

This is serious so don’t laugh..

Chicken Little said … “The sky is falling, the sky is falling, let’s go tell the King!”

Instead, it turns out the only thing falling was the Chicken “Limbo” Game.

Imagine, a “limbo” game collapses when kids use it! Who could have guessed?

Amazing fact #2, kids get hurt when they play.

My kids had a Chicken Limbo (14 years ago now) and it fell over all the time. Of course, they also knocked things over all over the house.

And my daughter got hurt jumping off the bed (after I told her to stop jumping on the bed). It took three stitches to close the wound. Fourteen years later, she still has a scar on her forehead! Recall the BED! (Or maybe the window sill that she hit her head on…)

Here is the serious news about the recall:

- - -

Milton-Bradley is recalling about 461,000 Chicken Limbo Electronic Party Games after reports of the product collapsing unexpectedly, causing bumps, bruises, cuts and one fractured foot, U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission officials said.

Milton Bradley has received 46 reports of the game unexpectedly coming apart and 23 reports of injuries.



Owners of the game should take it away from children immediately and contact Milton Bradley, based in East Longmeadow, Massachusetts, to receive a free repair kit, the CPSC said. The company can be reached at 1-800-245-0910, or at its Web site at www.miltonbradley.com

- - -

Product liability isn’t a joke but this may be taking things a liitle to far.

Friday Joke - Simple Human Error

Friday, February 24th, 2006

Pencilbudlight

This has been a very busy week at SI and with the Summit coming up and my two week trip to Europe to teach a 5-Day TapRooT(R) Advanced Root Cause Analysis Team Leader Course in Aberdeen, Scotland, and a 3-Day TapRooT(R)/Equifactor(R) Equipment Troubleshooting and Root Cause Failure Analysis Course in Brussels, Belgium, I need a lighthearted joke to get me ready for the weekend. So don’t be offended. Just click the black box (mpeg movie) above, watch and laugh.

And if you have more serious human performance problems to investigate, attend one or all of these courses/meetings:

Friday Joke - Communications NI Root Cause

Friday, February 17th, 2006

200602151806

Maybe this was a marketing ploy or an “I did exactly what he told me” example of malicious compliance. But it does remind us that inadequate communications can lead to mistakes.

Of course, TapRooT(R) Users know that the Root Cause Tree(R) covers these kinds of errors. But sometimes we would like to learn more about preventing communication mistakes. That’s exactly what Vincent Phipps of TLC LLC will talk about at the TapRooT(R) Summit.

So if you are interested in Communication Techniques to Stop Human Errors, attend Vincent’s talk from 1-2:20 on Wednesday and learn practices that go beyond the standard three-way communications techniques.

For a complete Summit Schedule see:

http://www.taproot.com/summit.php?sched=1

and used the buttons on the left to display the schedule for particular tracks.

For a Summit Brochure (pdf) click here.

Friday Joke - This is What Happens When You Get Stupid on Super Sunday

Friday, February 10th, 2006

Car



Frank Wright of Jacobs Engineering sent me this link:

http://www.co.arapahoe.co.us/citizeninfo/Vehexp.doc

According to the police report in the linked document, it seems that the car’s owner thought that bringing a balloon filled with acetylene to a Super Bowl party would add to the celebration.

But this was not to be a Super Sunday for this jokester … The balloon exploded in the car.

The results are pictured above.

At first I couldn’t decide if this should be the Monday Accident or the Friday Joke. But blowing up your own car and then getting arrested (see the police report at the link) … this just had to make the joke category.

Perhaps readers can use this event to once again caution employees that horseplay and practical jokes can go seriously wrong. Even though no one was killed by this stupidity, an even worse accident could have been the result if the balloon was ignited in a house full of people.

Friday Joke - Root Cause Analysis Flow Chart that Never Fails

Friday, February 3rd, 2006

Here’s a PowerPoint(R) that you should try to find root causes.

It was sent to me by a TapRooT(R) User who says his management really likes it, so he would like to remain anonymous.

ProbSolvingFlowchart.ppt

Note that this is what blame in an investigation always leads to.

Friday Joke - Somebody on that snowplow couldn’t believe the opportunity … Let’s get on the news!

Friday, January 27th, 2006

Watch this and laugh. It was sent by a TapRooT(R) User as an example of a “loss of situational awareness.”

Snowplow

Was this a near-miss or a slight hit?

What were the Safeguards that failed that allowed this funny incident to happen?

Do some quick root cause analysis … What were the root causes of the failure of the Safeguards that you believe should have been in place?

What Safeguards kept this accident from being worse? (What if there had been a large stone or an old muffler in the snow?)

What should the DOT do to avoid these incidents? Are your ideas based on root cause analysis or Safeguard Analysis?

What should the news crew do to avoid these incidents? Are your ideas based on root cause analysis or Safeguard Analysis?

Sometimes what seems like a funny mistake is really an opportunity for learning.

- - -

PS: If you have a good joke or funny video that relates to accident investigation, root cause analysis, or performance improvement - or if its just real funny and doesn’t relate to anything - send it to me via the info@taproot.com e-mail address.

Thanks

Mark

Friday Joke - Interviewing Honesty

Friday, January 20th, 2006

Everyone who performs investigations of accidents has probably done an interview and suspected that not everything they heard was true.

The Simpsons always have an over-the-top way of making a point. Here is a short clip that shows the genius of The Simpsons show and that gets the point across about interviewing honesty in a funny way.

Liedetect

A TapRooT(R) User sent it to me after he attended the 5-Day TapRooT(R) Course and learned the 14 Step Interviewing Process.

For more information about the 5-Day Course, click here.

Friday Joke: Look Straight Ahead, Keep Going, Maybe Nobody Will Notice

Friday, January 13th, 2006

Foxanddogs

Sometime people look straight ahead and they don’t see obvious safety hazards.

How many times have I heard:

“Its ALWAYS been that way.”

You may be the only one too see the hazard.

Do you ignore it or report it?

Do you allow it to exist or fix it?

Do you let others know when they are creating a hazard to themselves or others?

Friday Joke - New Corporate Policy

Friday, January 6th, 2006

A TapRooT(R) User forwarded this to me and said that a friend had forwarded it to him.

Seems that to reduce corporate liability, the company had introduced a new policy that allowed only one alcoholic drink at corporate functions.

I think an engineer came up with this response…

Onedrink

I guess the company should have used SMARTER. Obviously, their corrective action was not Specific enough!

Friday Joke - Sign of Quality

Friday, December 16th, 2005

Quality

Steve believes in truth in advertising.

Friday Joke - Holiday Song with a Nuclear Theme

Friday, December 9th, 2005

A nuclear industry TapRooT(R) User sent me this song with a holiday tune and a nuclear theme.

Workinginnpp

Friday Joke - Candidate for Drug Testing

Friday, November 18th, 2005

Homedep11

Some thoughts:

When is someone a candidate for “for cause” drug testing for off-the-job behavior?

What hazards would be created if this idiot made it to the highway?

Would three trips (or four) really cost that much gas?

How much does it cost to get your rear suspension completely replaced?

When will VW start building heavy duty pickup trucks?

And finally:

Who IS the guy sleeping patiently in the passenger seat?

Friday Joke - Lego Accident

Friday, November 11th, 2005

A TapRooT(R) User sent me this “video” of a lego worker involved in an accident on what looks like a lego oil rig.

Remember - even toy workers need a safety improvement program!

Lego Rig Accident

Friday Joke - How did the copier get broken?

Friday, November 4th, 2005

Imagine you were assigned to figure out how the copier (equipment that costs more than $50,000) was broken.

No one seems to have any idea what happened.

No one admits they were involved.

The glass is broken and there is substantial damage to the scanning mechanism. Repair costs were more than $10,000.

(more…)

Friday Joke - Extra Hazards of Australian Bungee Jumping

Friday, October 28th, 2005

It’s FRIDAY and time for a JOKE!

Just when you thought of all the possible hazards when bungee jumping, watch this video, and THINK AGAIN!!!

Bungee_jump.wmv

Friday Joke on Thursday!

Thursday, October 20th, 2005

I’m taking Friday off (my youngest daughter’s 16th birthday) so I decided to do the week’s joke a day early.

Look closely at the name of the company on the “sinking” van below.

0462

Friday Joke - Root Cause Of Crime? Watch This and Remove All Doubt.

Friday, October 14th, 2005

Michele, one of our TapRooT(R) Instructors in Canada, sent me this video.

The video is suppose to be a real security video tape. I think it looks like a fake, but the point made about the lack of intelligence of the criminals is still funny.

Just call them Dumber and Dumbest.

break_enter.wmv

Friday Joke - Pictures from Canada

Friday, October 7th, 2005

Michele Lindsay, one of our Canadian TapRooT(R) Instructors, sent me the following pictures in an e-mail titled, “Only in Canada”.

Have a good laugh…

Canada

Shorts

Mounties

Busservice

Snow

Christmas

Hockey

Firehazard

Friday Joke

Friday, September 30th, 2005

For those who need labels for everything …

0093

Fastest Root Cause Analysis

Monday, September 26th, 2005

Several people e-mailed me that I had left out the fastest way to find root causes from my comments about ways to save time when investigating smaller incidents.

(more…)

Quit Complaining About Your Job

Saturday, September 24th, 2005

A TapRooT(R) user sent me these pictures in an e-mail titled “Quit Complaining About Your Job.”

Click on them to make them larger.

Quitcomplainingaboutyourjob

Quitcomplainingaboutyourjob 1

Quitcomplainingaboutyourjob 3

Quitcomplainingaboutyourjob 4

Presentation - Problem Solving Flow Chart

Friday, August 5th, 2005

Powerpoint File

NOTE: This is a Powerpoint file

(more…)

Video - Bad Day For the TV Announcer

Friday, August 5th, 2005

Windows Media File
NOTE: This video is in MPEG format
(more…)